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75 Funny Goat Jokes And Puns To Make You Smile

Collection of funny and clever goat jokes and puns that are perfect for cheers and harmless laughs.

Goat Jokes And Puns


Goat jokes indulge our appetite for the absurd, yet the cleverest also carry an undercurrent of substance. Have our societal depictions of goats been narrow or misguided? Some goat jokes unravel assumptions, revealing these headstrong creatures contain multitudes beyond the superficial.

The finest goat jokes encourage us to reconsider easy stereotypes and acknowledge depths often overlooked. With an open mind, even the most playful goat-based quips may unveil surprising truths that spur us to reevaluate ourselves and our world.

Best Goat Jokes

Goats eating tin cans, butting heads, and climbing where they shouldn’t – experience the funniest goat jokes capturing the quirky antics of these farm animals.

Best Goat Jokes
Best Goat Jokes

1. What do you call a goat who works as a landscaper?

A lawn mow-er! (Pun)

2. A goat walked into a bar. The bartender said, “We don’t serve goats!” The goat replied, “That’s fine, I’ll just have some soda.”

3. Goats have always seemed a bit shifty to me. Like they’re up to something, you know?

4. Yep, I totally know 20 hilarious goat jokes off the top of my head. Finding GOAT humor is so easy!

5. Where do goats go for entertainment?

To the baa-thers!

6. “I’m a carnivore,” said my friend as he bit into a goat cheese salad.

7. How does a goat send mail?

Through the post billy service!

8. This morning I woke up feeling a little goat-cramped in my bedroom! There was barely enough room to stir.

9. Why do goats hate getting their pictures taken?

They’re always petting zoated!

10. How do you make a goat float?

Two scoops of ice cream, goat milk, and root beer!

11. Why don’t goats do stand-up comedy?

Because their jokes always goat booed!

12. Friend: Know any good goat jokes?

Me: Yep, I kid you not!

13. Why don’t goats tell jokes when they drink?

Because it would be sill-tea!

14. What do you call a goat who solves mysteries?

Sherlock Goatmes!

15. There once was a goat who loved soda a bunch
He’d guzzle it down with nary a crunch
The fizz and the bubbles
Those sweet sugary doubles
His belches roared loud with each Mountain Dew punch!

Goat Puns To Laugh

Give a bleat for the silliest goat puns and their kids. We’ve gathered the most hilarious goat wordplay that will have you chuckling.

Goat Puns To Laugh

1. What do you call a goat who works as a scientist?
A biology bleater!

2. Why did the goat get in trouble at school?

He was acting up in class and being a baaaaad kid.

3. What do you call a goat who works on a farm?

An agri-cultured goat!

4. Why don’t goats ever have enough money?

Because they’re always broke!

5. Why did the goat join the band?

Because he had the bleats!

6. Why don’t goats like jokes?

They prefer straight-up baa-d humor.

7. How do goats get their fiber?

Broad-baa-nd!

9. Why was the goat farmer so successful?

He had a lot of goatee-nis!

10. Why don’t goats ever lend money?

They’re afraid they won’t get it baaack!

11. Why don’t goats tell secrets?

Because they might spill the beans!

12. What do you call a goat that helps you get into your house?

A scape-goat!

13. Why did the goat get in trouble with the king?

He was caught goat-ssiping!

14. How do goats get over hills?

They climb Mount-and-goat over!

15. What’s a goat’s favorite sport?

Rowing goat!

16. There once was a goat who loved baking breads
He’d knead dough and bake loaves way past bed
His fresh baked baguettes
And ciabattas he gets
Made his goat bakery quite well fed!

17. Why don’t goats make good dancers?

They have two left feet!

18. Why don’t goats like loud cars?

They’re afraid they’ll get mu-fleated!

19. Why are goats always grumpy in the morning?

They wake up on the wrong side of the hay!

20. What do you call a goat that helps cook?

A sous-chef!

Cool Jokes About Goats

That one about the goat trying to eat everything always cracks me up. Check out these other cool goat jokes highlighting the curious, amusing escapades of goats.

Cool Jokes About Goats

1. Why don’t goats like archery?

It gets their goat!

2. What do you call a happy goat?

A jolly bleater!

3. Why was the goat so eager to go to the aquarium?

He heard they had a billy-on fish!

4. What did the goat build with his construction blocks?

A mega block castle!

5. What did the baby goat get for her birthday?

A brand new bike with training wheels!

6. The goat was performing dramatic monologues, he should be in bleating Broadway plays!

7. What game did the goat play with his friends? A rousing game of leapfrog!

8. Goat activity book titled “1001 Ways to Annoy Your Human” becomes bestseller. Tips include eating paperwork, yelling for no reason, and pretending you can’t hear them calling you.

9. BREAKING: A herd of goats briefly escaped the petting zoo and ran amok downtown, leading to multiple “goaticuffs” with authorities. No turtlenecks were harmed during the incident.

10. OVERHEARD: Mom, can I pleeeease get a baby goat as a pet? I promise to take good care of it! I’ll even create an Instagram account so its fame can get us money for more goats!

11. Craigslist ad: For sale – one adult goat trained in martial arts and parkour. Skills include roundhouse kicking, backflips, and jumping over fences. Asking $500 or best offer.

12. Goat whisperer wanted. Must have experience with stubborn elderly goats who pretend to be deaf. Salary includes free room and board at our goat retreat center.

13. Caution! Guard goat on duty. Do not enter without petting me first.

14. Goat Out Loud Podcast highlighted: How to Throw a Goatastic Party; Interview with Goat Mayor; Bleating Out Goat Karaoke Songs.

15. Local goat breaks record for most soda cans balanced on horns at one time. Says secret was using extra sticky soda.

16. Goat mindset coach emphasizes knowing your true talents. Just because you can climb doesn’t mean you should. Focus on what really matters – like napping.

17. A farmer was interviewed about entering his prize goat in the county fair competition. When asked what he feeds the goat, the farmer replied “Oh, just your standard diet of can-soda and pizza.”

18. BREAKING NEWS: A local goat has just been hired to work as a lawn mower and weed eater at city hall. The mayor calls it an innovative and cost-effective way to keep grounds maintenance costs down.

19. GOAT WANTED poster seen around town: “Missing: One small black and white goat answers to Billy. Was last seen trespassing at the local garden store. If found, please return to rightful owner so Billy can apologize for eating all the tulip bulbs.”

20. Neighbor 1: Did you hear all that racket coming from the goat farm last night? Sounded like a party gone out of control!

Neighbor 2: I know, right? Totally wild. I think they were celebrating the goat’s 16th birthday.

Short Goat Jokes

These rapid-fire short jokes about goats poke fun at goats’ mischief, like noshing on gardens and climbing to bizarre heights. Get your quick fix of funny goat quips here!

Short Goat Jokes
Short Goat Jokes

1. Sign in front of goat house: “No Goat Loans here. We learned our lesson after lending Billy to the local theater as a prop for their production of The Goat, or Who is Sylvia? Let’s just say that particular Billy did not understand the play was fictional.”

2. The goat’s Tinder profile listed his interests as “mountain climbing, marathons, and improv comedy.” His date was in for a surprise when he just wanted to nap at the cafe.

3. GOAT WISDOM: Don’t climb on the roof just to seem cool. That’s a baaad idea. Take it from me, your local goat expert.

4. Goat 1 to Goat 2: Did you hear about Jerry? He got his horns stuck trying to break through the fence at the zoo! Some goats never learn.

5. My goat ate all the grass in my yard. When I complained, he just told me to “stop being so graze-y.”

6. Took my goat to a magic show. He jumped on stage and revealed how every trick was done. Some talent scouts said he could have a career as a goat-buster.

7. Sent my goat to astronomy camp. Caught him trying to ram the telescopes because he thought they were a gateway to the moon.

8. My goat loves listening to pop music. His favorite artist is Taylor Swifted.

9. Taught my goat to play tennis. He keeps hitting the ball out of the court. His form is pretty baad.

10. Took my goat hiking. He kept wandering off the trail to eat grass. I told him to stop being such a bam-boozler!

11. My goat entered a pie eating contest. He won first prize even though he ate the pie tins too. Talk about iron goat!

12. My goat started an indoor gardening business. His slogan is “We deliver greens to your living rooms and kitchens!”

13. Bought my goat a trampoline. Now he keeps invasion of the body snatchers. When I asked him why, he said it was just for goat kicks.

14. Person 1: Knock knock

Goat: Who’s there?

Person 1: A herd of goats.

Goat: A herd of goats who?

Person 1: A herd of goats better scram before they eat all your cabbage!

Goat: Hey! Not cool.

15. Person 1: Did you hear about the new movie called Crouching Goat, Hidden Dragon?

Person 2: No, what’s it about?

Person 1: Literally a goat hiding from a dragon. Not as epic as it sounds.

Goat: Ugh, Hollywood needs new ideas.

16. Person 1: What do you call a goat that knows karate?

Person 2: I don’t know, what?

Person 1: Billy Kick!

Goat: He better not try to hoof me! I know Tai Goat Do.

17. Person: Knock knock

Goat: Who’s there?

Person: Goat grapes

Goat: Goat grapes who?

Person: Goat grapes the best! Want some?

Goat: No thanks, I’m goat-ood.

Goat Meme Jokes

From those shouting goats to memes about their weird eyes, we compiled the most popular and downright hilarious viral goat jokes to entertain you.

While goats themselves seem an unlikely source of humor, the examples provided demonstrate the comedic potential of exploring unexpected juxtapositions. By applying goat traits and imagery to unlikely contexts, these goat jokes tap into the inherent amusement of defying expectations. Though not exhaustive, this collection of goat puns illustrates the imaginative joy that can come from viewing the world askance.